Promos are commin soon...n its real soon but the thoughts of prepartion aint even there yet...school work load never lessen but onli increase with each day...it seems like a never endin cycle now to go thru school everyday tryin to survive without gettin scolded n told off...wad a life...dunno wad im doin to my life myself...lost practically all the drive that sustain me for so long...

Once again been a bastard to some poor dude without even intendin to do so...sigh sometimes its jus unfair dat even not doin anythin one still cannot escape the fate of bastardin someone else...dun even know wad i can do to help dat poor guy...dude i realli didnt do anythin...maybe if people actually knows wads goin on den maybe they can save me from the irony of the conception of many...n when u know wad it is for me maybe u guys will start to sympathise with me instead...

Sigh uncle is in hospital in mild stroke...all of a sudden it jus happened...it never rains but pours...worries with complications n everythin to add on to my life...family quarrels tearin everythin apart...

Life was never said to be a bed of rose...mine? i guess its a bed of thorns ba...

The devil is workin to hard for my case...

Wont life be great if one can pig out the whole day...
N not worri bout the ironies of life?...

Today is realli one of those rare days...where i can come to school n laugh n smile with the rest n enjoy the crazy day...how i miss these days... where fake smiles n laughter r not needed...

Haha came to school at 9.22am apparently missin out on our principal scoldin durin the assemebly n turn up when 1/2 the pe period is gone :D wicked haha...told nordin dat i cant take pe n b4 i can even think of wad excuse to give this time he said "ah ok go help me take timin den' O.o" comin from him dats wierd...found out later dat those who get silver can skip the normal pe routine of runnin n crap n do more fun stuff like soccer n other games...it is den did i recieve the news dat i got bronze cuz of my stupid standing broadjump...got a-a-b-b-c den one stupid e for standin...ahh 3 cm somemore to a new grade...wanted to rejump den nordin said i told him i cant jump today... -.- i SWEAR i dun recall tellin him dat i can jump i onli told him dat i not doin pe...he inisist dat i did n even drag bala into the convo...

Nordin: I am sure u said u cant jump just now
Me: Sir i never la realli!!
Nordin: Bala u heard right?
Bala: Yaa sir he said dat just now ( he was lyin n laughin sia!!)
Nordin: see even bala heard......bala swear it across ur heart.....
*Bala places hand on right chest*
Bala: Ya sir i swear ( laughin)
Me: UR HEART ON THE LEFT LA!

after arguin n even showin dat bala wasnt truthful cuz dat ididot just want to kena me cuz he need 10cm while i onli need 3 cm for silver...nordin didnt let me jump -.- arghh..haha but laugh shortly when heard dat nordin played an equally cool one on raj haha

Nordin: Did u run last week?
Raj: ya i did
Nordin: dun lie last week holiday where got run?!

LOL haha heard dat raj expression was damn cartoon too bad i missed it cuz i came onli in the second half of lesson... =X

Chinese lesson after recess was a riot sia haha was tryin to argue with the teacher about how unfair it is for guys to always kena even when girls do the same mistake when he was tellin us about the newspaper article where this two students was on the train n the girl rest her head on the guy n slept den the guy subsequently also sleep...some bloke took the pic n send to the principal den the guy kena suspension for a week while the girl jus need to write an apology letter... 0-o wa lao the girl was the one who rested her head first n yet she got off while the poor guy kena sia...SEXIST!!! stupid system where the guy gets the blame while the girl always get off easy..n dats not the onli point...wad in the world is wrong with the stupid bloke who took the pic?! i mean come on the two students were outside school la...like wth...bleah stupid...fabian n the short hair girl came in class today n was spastic sia their excuse for bein late...haha cracked the whole class up sia...!! Was warnin nicole to tell paul to tell paul about the article den ended up kena pinch by her...see dat she went back to her old self sia...

Maths was a bore as usual totally didnt listen since the start of the topic until now so now practically zero bout it...have to rely on divine intervention for maths for promos sia...( or talissa's help also can :P) found a pic on the table of a pig...how fittin of all picture...a pig...took some snapshots of it but cant upload to the com so cant see but after dat miss poo happily broke my nice pencil the choir ppl gave me b4 drawin a pig n say its me...goodness...wads with the connection of the animal n me everywhere?...im not dat fat...am i??

Quote from kin peng: "Jealousy breeds hate..."
Add on from bala: " n violence"
after miss poo broke my pencil cuz its green n she jealous she didnt have it..(haha ok i make up the jealousy part but it was fittin in the situation den :P)

Other quotes from kin peng : "I will let jasmine be my girl friend!!"
Add ons by bala: " But she wont let u be her boyfriend!"

cant realli rmb wad other quotes he said but there r few other classics one haha...ah well...Miss kon didnt come so there is no lit lesson today...n to think i remembered to bring my lit ca assignment den she never come...wa piang...econs after dat was feelin random so me n choi was at the back of the class makin silly comparisson with whos prettier den who n whos more handsome for the ppl in our class n got some laughs out of dat too haha..

Was suppose to do cuban missile crisis after econs but ended up bein convinced to play soccer n yay scored all the 3 goals for my side!! =) ok la cuz we was one man up against bala n choi n they didnt realli block me most of the time but heck small things can bring small joy in life too...(on n thanks drink stall aunty for sneakin us some free drinks while refillin the drink machine :D ) principal came to talk to us after soccer n once again got caught for hair...sianz...went on bout how y she have to scold durin assemebly n all n was sorely tempted to tell her ma'mm i came after 9 la..wont know wad talkin u =P Gp compre test was crap sia super hungry n cant think at all stommach rumbled loudly 2 times durin the paper...bleah...went bubblin after dat n had 6 packets of fries den after comin home went for dinner had 2 bowls of rice n slice fish soup...ahh super full...oh n pak was being super retarded sia cuz he dropped his phone down n got some dent den he went "Oh my f**kin god...wa lao...wow...nat u rock..." over n over again after nat apparently managed to cover up the dent...

Should have know the good day wont last long...didnt know dat wad i said got bala into trouble...first thing i recieve when i came back online after eating was "F**K U"... =/ real sorri man...didnt meant it serious...shits sia sounds familiar?...im forever gettin others into trouble sia...tmd..."

i guess somethings in life cant be changed...its for life ba...

cuz i thought like them once..twice..a few times...
Suicide boy?
Na dats silly...y will i do somethin like dat?...
If im in the right mind dat is... =X

Saw the pic while randomly surfin...
cant say i totally understand how these people feel when they r bugged down by life n wanted the way out...though i dun agree with their ways i feel sorry for them...dat is till i thought bout my own life n feel sorri for myself!! ahh homework, promos n detention...all go away please...

Feelin a bit bored doin lit so take time off to put a picture of myself up =)
There panda a picture of me ( i know i not as handsome as ah ter la :P)

interestin look whos at the back..
is this considered a picture of both of us? :D haha jk

Today was suppose to hand up my lit ca assignment n give the lit presentation for atwood...both i didnt do... -.-" the presentation part not my fault sia...i did my share for once lor...its 3 -4 pages long with the different covers in colour somemore sia...stayed back in school to source but all for nothin...last night was on the conference with talissa the brain n shannon the brain on bala's phone den had to shower n wait till my sis is done with the phone den i call back which by den they have left n done the work already... -.-" ended up talkin with bala till close to 1 am den my mum nagged me till cant take it n headed for bed leavin my ca assignment undone as it is...brilliant sia...

Came for econs lecture where i ended up listenin to music n sleepin...( Alex toh's jia gei wo ) keep listenin to it cheers me up =) lookin at paul n nicole n listenin to dat song which was sent by paul its good to be reminded of the good stuff when two r brought tgt...

Lit after recess was like bleah...

Miss Kon: " those that haven hand up the lit ca assignment go outside now..."
Me: " err mam can i present first den go out?..."

So stupid sia...malu again as it turns out im the onli one other than kin peng who is not in school who haven handed it up yet...talissa n shannon practically did the whole presentation n i was standin behind them feelin dumb sia...my contribution to the whole presentation came at the last part where i squeeze in my 3 important words : "mistrust among them" wow....wad an accomplishment...

Was wonderin y the question was popped to me so sudden n out of the blue without any reason...ahh if onli it never came... =/ den maybe i might not feel so paiseh?...or dat i would not have felt so torn by emotions n logic...

Ah well wad happened happened no changin it...will pick myself up n move on with life ba i guess...i guess it comes easier subsequently when one get used to life's disappointment...haha dunno where im headin towards will see at the end ba...

Cover up with a smile n move on...
Dun lead the unsure heart n break it... =/

It never rains but it floods....
The sudden question caught me off gaurd n threw my thoughts into a mixed confusion...how i wished i kept everythin to myself from the start...was intendin to let time determine everythin but somehow everythin was hasten n i found myself unprepared...



Problems never come alone but in groups...
Confusion rack my mind as i struggle to comprehend wad had jus happened...one moment it was sunny the next it was rainin...wish nothin ever happen or dat nothin was said...den i could lead on my life with my thoughts to myself...i never got the chance n after givin away my inner thoughts im left with onli the feelin of emptiness n coldness...coldness dat i have felt once...



Wishin my existance away...
wad else is there for me to do...need some time alone...some peace...somewhere dat i can calm the heart n soothe the mind...

Ahhhh the week is screwed up n its onli the first day of the week...bleah...let me list out the crap dat its install for me for the next few days... :

2) Tuesday
Lit ca assignment which is like due last friday n i haven done anything...
Lit Margret Atwood presentation which has been changed so now suppose to do the cover page n themes instead of the original epigraphs which i looked up on already..

3) Wednesday
Lit great expectations presentation due...me bala kin peng n the two brains...we did nothin yet so far...so its like...so dead...got history tutorial n my ca assignment is still not up...last in the whole cohort to hand up...im dead man...

4)Thursday
stupid GP compre test at 4.10pm-6pm n have to hand in econs SIEA by 12 oclock...

5)Friday
History cuban missile crisis presentation with me bala n kin peng once again the infamous three tgt in the smae group...gonna be hard to get much work done unless we get determine sia...

today went for history test n was screwed big time sia...wrote totally out of point n dun even know for myself wad the hell im doin...shit first time im gonna fail history my best sub n the onli one where i can excel in...sigh...life stinks...

im in the school library tryin to do my lit research so can tell how desperate it is for me if u can find me in school doin work!! !@#$%^&*() oh n paul jus bang himself on the leg lol...

and paul was here wahahhahaahahahaha

spam spam spam spam spam spam spam

I bought a ticket to the end of the rainbow...
starting to open up finally...
N watch the stars crash into the sea...
letting go of the past bit by bit....
If i could ask god just one question...
the past is history, future a mystery, present a gift...
Y are'nt you here with me...
let me treasure the gift now den...

Ji@n : Cool eh my display pic?
Kin Peng: Dat guy is u meh?

Err.. ppl cant tell this bloke is me meh?! alamak sia y else would i put a guy's pic on my display pic?!! @.@"


Friday...the shortest day of school in a week n yet i still came late...ahh came school durin break cuz i conviently overslept =P i cant believe i volunteered to go help out for teachers day rally lol...Mrs Sze said she will ask the vice principal for permission so its like @_@ ahh they r gonna think im some enthu-tard la sia so paiseh...in the end she say ya can n hence will be helpin out durin the rally den.. =.= reach school durin break time n on my way in saw two other students late like me jus enterin the school compound haha! went to library to meet nat cuz she say got chocs :) n saw jason there so ended up in a very detailed discussion about our lan gamin experience dat day haha nat was laughin at umby's animated talk while me n umby discuss bout games...ahh so long since i enjoy the joys of computer gaming liao =/ found out later dat miss young wasnt feelin well so there is no gp n pw after the break which means no lesson for the day other den lit remedial (which i didnt intend on goin anyway..)! kp n bala was laughin at me upon tellin me the news...thanks eh bala!! quoted from him "wad r frens for? =D" o.O" haha anyway talissa n emily apparently was high or just not themselves lol...both were tellin lame jokes n riddles n had fun listenin n answerin some seriously riddiculous questions haha =D poor bala though got interrupted halfway n den he did somethin stupid dat he himself cant explain y he did dat...tsk tsk...i feel for u dude ( :P) saw hickey boy in the canteen n later in the library where me n emily walk deliberately towards him to take a sneak peak =D muahaha cant stop myself from laughin after dat cuz the guy instead of concealin it powdered his hickey sia!! :P

Went off with nat after dat to t-mart for my second time sia n went in to macs...we had A sundae but we ended up sittin there for 3-4 hours sia haha! nat was doin her hw on math while i was bascially jus listenin to music/day dreamin/stonin? about :) basically enjoyin the peace n quietness bein away from the world...

although wasnt doin much i felt happy in a way i haven felt for a long time... :) i guess it was u dat made it so...

went to kfc to eat after leavin macs n blind me saw the advertistment on the tray as the real or chicken chop n wanted to jus walked off with it without waitin for the real one...alamak malu sia... =.= after the meal we went back to macs again where sat there n waste time till nat's parent came to pick us up to go for meetin n there was a share of dinner for me prepared too bad got carsickness n onli managed to down half of it b4 gettin a headache n didnt finnish the food...the talk was interestin...like the part bout zeal...find it meaningful wanted to blog more bout it but forgot liao.. -.- (got the main meaning however) oh n nat gave a testimony...went off supper with them but while waitin was foolin around in the van with the two bryans, nat n her bro but didnt realised dat ended up causin problems for nat...im realli sorri i didnt meant for it to happen... :( got nat into trouble again with her parents n was feelin as down ( or even more than) as her throughout supper...seems like trouble follows me wherever i go n always to the wrong person...miserable supper with my phone bat dead n dad callin me to come home early...n the sugar cane drink was horrid...waste of my $2.50...got a lift from uncle victor n melody ( bless them ) who lived in jurong n yet send me to serangoon n basically lay down upon reachin home n got absorbed in my thoughts till i fall asleep...

guess its my fault for causin the problems...i realli didnt meant it...

but was it when it wasnt deliberate?...sometimes my best is not enough...

is it realli wrong to be me? wads wrong with me the way i am?...

or do i have to be like everyone else...is it necessary to be accepted?...

Should have remembered from the previous lesson yet sometimes one still makes the same mistake...(wonder if its just dumb or human nature?...)

The gym...Feels good to be back trainin again...the familiar place the familiar feelin...a place where one could just leave the outside world n jus focus on trainin...where the rest of the world doesnt matter n all i need is the weights to be with me...went by myren n hydher's blog n gain my motivation from them once again to restart my trainin...wish i got their determination n zeal for trainin but shall work hard n hopefully be like dem one day...hydher was right dat each one of us r onli giving excuses to ourselves...well no more...its back to hittin the weights hard...has gotten soft without pushin myself n residin in self-pity aint gonna help so time to do somethin right for myself for once...

I rather go thru the dead weights in the gym
den to carry the livin weight of the harsh world outside...

time to go do some hw n go for a run later...let the trainin resume...

Ah im writing this post while most of the nation people are celebratin national day...hmm brilliant eh? -.- well a short list of things that happened recently...but a freakin long post so u have been warned in advance!!

1) Friday
Class photo retakin today due to the blotch up one of the previous one where bala n raj was too black to been seen (no offence but its the truth!!) look! although the rest of us also appear dark la n my nice short tie dat stands out from the rest =D

Although in the second retaken photo they still look dark but this time we have a full class attendance!!Like OMG for the first time in dunno how long the whole class is finally in school at one time!! ah but this time no short tie sia...miss young dun let me get back my short tie =/

Haha after class photo takin kin peng came up with a crazy dare that the guys could not refuse =P As the school rule state that we cant leave the school compound until after 12.50 even if ur lesson has ended( which seems like a dumb rule to me) we decided on somethin crazy/stupid/fun =P me, kin peng, bala , russell and paul ran down from the foyer towards the gate yellin n makin a lot of noise on our way down n the poor teacher saw us from a distance n was using hand signs to ask us to stop! haha his expression was priceless as he saw a group of students attemptin to run out of school through the teacher stationed at the gates!! haha the twist was that upon reachin the gates we continued runnin leavin the bloke starin at us as we ran by the gate n instead of runnin out we ran on to the other side n just laughed *wicked cool!* on our way back we walked by the gate laughin den kp n bala ran out of the gate n back in again laughin their ass off but kp laugh too much n fell scrapin his knees while the rest of us just laughed even harder!! sigh miss poo is a lousy video-er though we asked her to vedio the whole thing but it came out bleah...all shakin n not capturin the thingy..ahh nvm we still had fun =) kp n bala went on even further though as heard from them that they ran circles around the teacher after that n kena detention -.-" ( a BIT smart ah...but nvm they wont go for the detention anyway!) Went to tm to eat lunch with nat,bala n russell while waitin for nat's parents to pick us up for my first firday church meetin...haha bala n russell went on the massage chair in the middle of the whole mall n their comment (" haha get to upskirt ppl... -.-") then they went on the i-gallop which looks damn funny sia...had a good laugh at them lol n to think they say they want to come back next week to try the vibrating belt.. o.O went back to school after dat n just wanted to walk by n see how the teams were playin in the softball open but eneded up playin for dixie's team in the softball opens which apparently didnt ended as i thought it did on last wed...was feelin pissed again at another team...(wow like its something new...) this time though they had the potential to win the whole competition but after one after another series of blunders...i give up...like wad the heck...now im wonderin y in the world did i even get so caught up in it...its not even my team!!...jeez...oh n got my toe injured durin base runnin thanks to the wrong pair of shoes i was wearin -.- woweee....ah dun care if they r gonna bitch bout me after the game n all i cant be bothered with them anyway...went off to t-mart(my first time hard to believe eh) with nat after dat to get a drink b4 her parents pick us up for the meetin...ahh was freezin there sia! had 4 flashbacks thoughout the journey n durin the meetin den end up emoin abit plus was bit tired after the whole day so ended up ppl thought i was moody...hmm...went home n listen to music n basically stone till i fall asleep....

2) Saturday

Was a nice n relaxin uneventful day where i get to chill,sleep n tv about for the whole day...ahh feels good just bummin around for once =) need more of this sort of days!!!

3) Sunday

Went to church today without hidin the fact from my parents for once after i talked to my dad bout it ( although he wants to continue the discussion with me bout religion he didnt reacted as vehemently against it as i thought he would...guess with old age u tend to be less hot-temepered a lil ba but he didnt give his consent either..sigh well its a first step..) played basketball a lil durin lunch n after the second meetin...haven realli played basketball for a long time since secondary school after stoppin it n kinda miss the game...hehe lucky the shootin aimin has not faded dat much yet can still do some decent shootin wahaha won against 7 of the kids plus nat =) soccer was uneventful for me wasted some good chances arghh...nat scored one from across the other side...waaa...chris scored the rest of the main bulk for our team...me? lol runnin about n wastin a few good shots =.= ahh well at least basketball didnt let me down -phews- went to eat after dat at serangoon gardens where the sugarcane is plentiful n the food is ok :) nat's mum came over to talk to me n subtely hinted that i should not spend so much time with nat which i found quite funny although nat apparently didnt find it so...ahh she ended up becomin upset with her parents (dun say u didnt cuz u cant lie from me gal!!) which ended up makin me feel so crappy la...was thinkin dat cuz of my presence ended up causin her problems with her parents =/ even thought of not goin back to the church if it will help with she n her parents...but in the end nat asked me not to do so or i would onli make things worse...ahh seems like im always bringin some kind of problem with me to the ppl around me wherever i go even to church!! =( had a lousy time dat night n slept on the couch in the livin room for not wantin to disturb the rest...

4)Monday

woke up early today...cuz i fell of the couch n woke up -.- brilliant sia...thus i ended up early for school for once!! haha managed to grab a drink b4 mornin assemebly something that i haven been able to do since first day of school sia!! school was ok other den history where im in shit cuz i haven hand in my history assignment which was due like ages ago...arghh have to do it later sia or else this time im realli realli dead!!...went to help nat with the national day packin of the gifts ( = skippin a bit of econs) n went bubblin after that where me, nat, pak n later boy boy ate like at least 7 packets of fries sia!! waa wad pigs...tsk tsk :P nat came n join my class for econs later where she hid in the corner with the girls although i was quite sure miss yup saw her n she didnt comment though...bala was playin frozen throne durin the lesson with his labby n was tryin to give advice next to him without the teacher noticin it haha! amelia was saying y i bring my girlfriend into class ahh the same thingy where everyone thinks im nat's bf -.- wif everyone havin the same thinkin i wont be suprise one day if i walk out of class one day n get whack by a whole group of guys who thinks im realli nat bf =X waa of all person she has to say me? lol n to think i caught her with her boyfriend outside the library on my way in n she told miss yup she had to go to the toilet...bleah..econs presentation was totally whacked up sia..lol although i feel bad for not doin anything for the group...the presentation totally didnt make any sense to me n i jus had to bluff along with king peng n lionel thru the presentation where it was just a total comic show sia...confessed to miss yup dat i didnt helped out in the whole thing after the lesson though n she said she knew it already upon lookin at the powerpoint but at least she said i answer well for the nationalisation question -phew- the guys were enjoyin playin with nat's bike on the way to the bubble tea shop n bala's bag kena hole sia due to it haha unlucky dude...on the way back the 81 zoomed by once again n i missed the bus like always whenever i come from the bubble tea shop..arghh!!stupid sia...

5) Tuesday

National day celebration today n i reached school late again lol...basically went thru the activities n sing/yell/shout/throw planes/sleep/goof about durin the hall activites n went off to tm to grab a bite with bala, amellia n nat...went off to play lan after dat with kp n frens at grandlink where we found jason, yi yang n fren...won once against them den lost to teck wei n his frens where thru out the game kp's fren keep arrowin me for mistakes...bleahs...didnt enjoy the game much sia..was super tired after dat n slept a bit intendin to wake up later in the night but ended up oversleepin till the next day...

6) wednesday-today

national day today ended up goin to gym where had a nice satisfactory workout although im gonna complain dat the class tee shrunk after washin sia..bleah cuz it cant be i grew in size without trainin n yet the shirt become tighter (not across the waist thankfully) thus conclusion the class tee shrinks on washin!! ahhh!! came back slept a while n decide to finally get down to bloggin after ppl keep tellin me to do so....shall go n watch the national day thingy now ba...thus endin my long long post! :D

P.s thanks nat for the change in blogskin! as usual i didnt do anythin cuz im a total IT-failure so haha thanks!! =)